13 October 2009

Random craps

Datang bulan dilemma alert! Btw, why it seems like so damn weird right now? I mean, the way ‘it’ showing itself. Heh. And why I’m telling it here? It is because of the pain. Ceh, or maybe I am too tired. (-.-“)

Please, cepat la lepas this moth ni. Sure it will be a busy month, with the study week and the final exams. Not including the assignments that need to submit before the finals. You know, this is the moment that I usually say, “Why I feel this semester is so damn busy?” Padahal I am the one who love to do things last minutes. So, serve me right la kan. Stress seniri sampai mintak balik rumah everyday. This study week new resolution, JANGAN BALIK RUMAH BOLEH TAK? ;-p

So here comes the main reason why I’m posting an entry tonight. But I know, this is the feeling for once aje, tomorrow sure the feeling will be flushed out of my mind. And that’s why I’m posting it now, tade nak procrastinate lagi.

Aryanti always said that I’m ego facing everything through my life. Well sayang, it have its own pro and cons. And certain time I can be so fragile until I fall and cry all night long. Hah, tak memasal. I don’t show my exact feeling, I’ll let it be.

I am imperfect, I make mistakes. I know I hurt a lot of people with my behaviour. Sometimes, I’m being too selfish and don’t care bout others. But the real things is, each things happen to me, I’ll consider, is it my fault? Why did they doing that? Why am I being like this? And I’m facing it like nothing happen over and over again. At last I realised everything will be okay. But still I know how to feel guilty. (-:

How I gained my egoness?
It is easy, just cut all the strings that will bring you to the main problem and it is over. What I mean by cut is cut everything! Don’t put yourself in the middle of the problem and don’t let yourself being used by someone who doesn’t deserve you. It is not worth it. Worst, why hurting yourself for someone who doesn’t care bout you? If they care pun, it is not real they’re faking it you know. Maybe it is not simple as that. ;-p
For some people, even for years pun then still attached with the strings without realising it. Maybe.

Life is like a drama, each and everything we do will creates something different. We fall, we gained our strength back, we laugh, we cry. Everything goes with their flow, the ups and downs, the pain and the happiness. Life is fair. If our life been documented sure it will be a great story, because life is unexpected.
Haih, am I talking about life? ;-p

Ok, I need to back with my assignments. Good morning!

p.s: Sorry for all my wrong doings. I mean it, to everyone. (-: